Heffalumps and Woozles

No one prepared me. Not one damn person. (I, apparently, need to surround myself with better friends.) While I could be heinous and keep the uninformative trend going, I would hate for anyone to experience what I went through (still going through). I am referring to Disney's Christopher Robin.

I have no idea what you all think or expect, of this film. I know what I thought and expected. I rolled into the theater, yesterday after church, expecting one of my favorite childhood stories turned movies (which includes my second favorite character of all-time, Tigger) to have been remade into a glorious, lighthearted, and uplifting film. A nostalgic piece. A feel good piece. 

What I did NOT expect was to be full on crying, two minutes in, and full on SOBBING, within fifteen. People, I literally had to cover my mouth, to quiet my hysteria (complete with gasping for air)! Due to the fact that I was EMOTIONALLY UNPREPARED, I had to just let the CROCODILE tears fall, using my shirt and jacket as a tissue. (I disgust myself.) I pretty much never stopped crying. From beginning to end, I was either welling up with tears or bawling. In between that chaos, though, I was laughing out loud - as in AUDIBLY! (The poor bastards behind me, no doubt, believed I was experiencing some sort of psychotic break, with my fluctuating ups and downs, extreme highs and lows, screams of WHY, OH GOD, WHY mixed with exclamations of I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS MOVIE!)

Disney's Christopher Robin took me on an emotional roller coaster. While highly irritated that I was hoodwinked, as I would have brought an entire box of tissues (just for me) and a bottle of wine tucked in my jacket sleeve (also, just for me), this film was one of the BEST movies I have seen - in years! I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT! Do I recommend it without tissues/napkins/an old bath towel, a Xanax, and an empty theater (rather than everyone you know, on a Sunday afternoon) - NO, no I would not.

However, if you are able to come prepared to cry harder than you have in awhile, knowing you will be forced to self reflect on your life and the things you have prioritized as important, only to discover you have been living your life 100% wrong, your children are going to grow up to resent you, your marriage is more than likely doomed, you have lost your sense of adventure and imagination (did you ever have one or did it just slowly and silently slip away), and/or you are going to die alone, unfulfilled, and miserable (as in real-life Heffalumps and Woozles) - THEN, YOU MUST GO SEE IT!

**UNRELATED Side Note: Does anyone have a number for a good therapist? Asking for a friend.